by grace

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Posts by by grace

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  58

  Current & Former Elders- Will You Help Witnesses - Get Out of the Cult ?

  by flipper in

  1. jw
  2. friends

  i know ,at first glance it seems like an impossibility .

  i really haven't lost my mind here folks.

  hear me out on this one.

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  by grace

  Abandoned - wow, thanks for that link. Excellent poem! I truly agree.
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  58

  Current & Former Elders- Will You Help Witnesses - Get Out of the Cult ?

  by flipper in

  1. jw
  2. friends

  i know ,at first glance it seems like an impossibility .

  i really haven't lost my mind here folks.

  hear me out on this one.

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  3. 
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  by grace

  Mr. Flipper,

  I have to correct myself, the book that I quoted to several of my friends via e-mail was from: The Subtle Power of Spiritual Abuse. You should definitely read that one, if you haven't already. I always told my mom, it's not a cult! I was so sure!!!! Between this book & Steve Hassan's, I knew I had been had.

  Here is an excerpt:

  Misplaced Loyalty: Because authority is assumed or legislated (and therefore not real), following must be legislated as well. A common way this is accomplished is by setting up a system where disloyalty to or disagreement with the leadership is construed as the same thing as disobeying God. Questioning leaders is equal to questioning God. After all, the leader is the authority, and authority is always right. This causes people to misplace their loyalty in a leader, a church, or an organization. Once again, this makes the wall around the system thicker and makes it more difficult to leave.
  
  We Alone Are Right: There are three factors that come into play here, adding up to misplaced loyalty. First, leadership projects a "we alone are right!" mentality, which permeates the system. Members must remain in the system if they want to be "safe," or to stay "on good terms" with God, or not to be viewed as wrong or "backslidden."
  
  Scare Tactics: Not long ago a Christian man made it clear to us that he had separated himself from the world by not fellowshipping with "the infidels." As we talked, we learned that his definition of "infidel" was not limited to non-Christians. It also included Christians from other denominations, certain Christians from his own denomination, and even Christians from his own church who didn't think as he did. In fact, we were dismayed to learn that we were also considered "infidels" because we failed to agree with him. We have counseled many Christians who, after deciding to leave their church, were told horrifying things. "God is going to withdraw His Spirit from you and your family." "God will destroy your business." "Without our protection, Satan will get your children." "You and your family will come under a curse." This is spiritual blackmail and it's abuse. And it does cause people to stay in abusive places.
  
  Humiliation: The third method of calling forth misplaced loyalty is the threat of humiliation. This is done by publicly shaming, exposing, or threatening to remove people from the group.In the abusive system, it is the fear of being exposed, humiliated, or removed that insures your proper allegiance, and insulates those in authority. You can be "exposed" for asking too many questions, for disobeying the unspoken rules, or for disagreeing with authority. People are made public examples in order to send a message to those who remain. Others have phone campaigns launched against them, to warn their friends and others in the group about how "dangerous" they are. One of several things usually happens after such pressures are employed. First, people stay and shut up. Second, they are eventually driven away because they end up isolated and spiritually starved to death. Third, they finally get up and say, "Fine, I am leaving because this is abusive and I disagree."
  
  Conclusion: When these characteristics exist in a church or Christian family system, the result will be spiritual abuse. It will be a closed system, with rigid boundaries that prevent people from leaving. There will be the perception of a lot of evil on the outside, to keep people in, and there will be a lot of power postured on the inside to compel you to perform. There will also be tired, wounded people who feel that they are either unspiritual or crazy. And they will have major problems relating to God from the heart.
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  58

  Current & Former Elders- Will You Help Witnesses - Get Out of the Cult ?

  by flipper in

  1. jw
  2. friends

  i know ,at first glance it seems like an impossibility .

  i really haven't lost my mind here folks.

  hear me out on this one.

  1. 
  2. 
  3. 
• 

  by grace

  Hi Mr. Flipper,

  I read Steve Hassan's book that you mentioned....I left the borg almost 3 years ago, actually my husband & I both left at the same time. We went in together, blew 10 years of our lives, and came out together. BTW, that is a great book!! Read it, and re-read a few sections, it's all good. If you or anyone else can help someone out, however it can be done, I say give it a try. I tried forwarding an e-mail of that information to several JWs. They responded that they were concerned for me that I might be reading apostate material. My husband tried to talk to some of our old "friends." It didn't work right off, but, you know if any seeds were planted, someday they may grow. :)

  It's a heck of a thing to waste years of your life trying to be a good JW. I just can't believe how much better I feel now!!! I'm finally able to work full time again. I was unemployed for 3 years (for the first time in my life). My autoimmune disease is GONE. Seriously, was tested, and it's gone. And, I'm taking another class at the community college this semester. I love life and enjoy living again.

  Leaving the WTS is the best decision I've ever made. Thanks to those of you on this site and others like it. I came across the truth about the truth (LOL) because I was looking for information about the "new publication" that was coming out at the convention I had coming up. Low & behold, I found someone talking about it, but I also came across some info about the UN scandal, and then many others. The truth really did set us free! Thank you all!!!

  And Mr. Flipper, since that is your name :) , I have to tell you, my husband and I went swimming with the dolphins in September in Key Largo. WOW what a great time we had. It was definitely one of the best things I've ever done. It's good to live again. I hope I give hope to someone out there. Here my husband and I are free from the bondage that we once lived in.
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  2

  Anyone had health problems disappear after leaving the WT?

  by by grace in

  1. jw
  2. experiences

  i'm looking for people who have had the experience of becoming very sick with chronic pain, an auto-immune disease, or some major health problem (collitus, diabetes, etc.

  ) while being involved with jehovah's witnesses, who then had a complete reversal after leaving the jehovah's witnesses.

  i am planning to write a book about my experience, and i'd like to get an idea of how many people out there have had a similar one.

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  by grace

  Hi everyone,

  I'm looking for people who have had the experience of becoming very sick with chronic pain, an auto-immune disease, or some major health problem (Collitus, Diabetes, etc.) while being involved with Jehovah's Witnesses, who then had a complete reversal after leaving the Jehovah's Witnesses.

  I am planning to write a book about my experience, and I'd like to get an idea of how many people out there have had a similar one. I was diagnosed with advanced Grave's disease (hyperthyroid), which is an auto-immune disease, and it amazingly "went away" shortly after I left the organization. I honestly didn't expect that to happen. I hoped, but didn't really think it could happen.....but it did!!! I am researching the effects of emotions on physical health. It's my opinion that the stress of being a Jehovah's Witness was so mentally/emotionally draining that it caused my body to have all kinds of pains and to even attack itself.

  I ask that you reply to this topic only if you are willing to give me consent to use your information in my book. I will not publish anyones name or anything like that. I only want to be able to give some examples of what people have experienced. The reason I want to write this book, is to hopefully help those who are still in the organization and even many of those who have left, as well as the whole world, to understand the power of the emotional trauma that one experiences by being a Jehovah's Witness, and also the relief one has when they are freed from the control/manipulation. It is truly amazing.

  Thank you so much,

  by grace
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  15

  Had a major illness disappear after leaving WT?

  by by grace in

  1. jw
  2. friends

  i'm looking for people who have had the experience of becoming very sick with chronic pain, an auto-immune disease, or some major health problem (collitus, diabetes, etc.

  ) while being involved with jehovah's witnesses, who then had a complete reversal after leaving the jehovah's witnesses.. i am planning to write a book about my experience, and i'd like to get an idea of how many people out there have had a similar one.

  i was diagnosed with advanced grave's disease (hyperthyroid), which is an auto-immune disease, and it amazingly "went away" shortly after i left the organization.

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  by grace

  Tall Penguin: Thank you so much for the info on the books......their titles sound really good!!! I've tried so many things for my chronic pain. I'd love to know what kind of alternative medicine you used and what was most effective. Please, please, please, share your knowledge!!! I still have some pain, but atleast now I'm able to work and exercise and function as a human being.

  Elsewhere: I know!!! Me too!!!
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  15

  Had a major illness disappear after leaving WT?

  by by grace in

  1. jw
  2. friends

  i'm looking for people who have had the experience of becoming very sick with chronic pain, an auto-immune disease, or some major health problem (collitus, diabetes, etc.

  ) while being involved with jehovah's witnesses, who then had a complete reversal after leaving the jehovah's witnesses.. i am planning to write a book about my experience, and i'd like to get an idea of how many people out there have had a similar one.

  i was diagnosed with advanced grave's disease (hyperthyroid), which is an auto-immune disease, and it amazingly "went away" shortly after i left the organization.

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  by grace

  Wow, that's incredible, some of the things we've endured that "disappeared" after leaving the WT. Very interesting, thanks for sharing. I really appreciate your help.

  I'm going to guess that there are lots of people out there that suffered from Fibromyalgia (I did), Chronic Myofascial Pain Syndrome (I did), Temperomandibular Joint Syndrome (TMJ), Tension Myalgia, all kinds of back pain (my husband and I both had that), gastrointestinal problems, chronic headaches, skin disorders, allergies including asthma, and we can't forget, good ol' Chronic Fatigue Syndrome.

  Hopefully there are still people out there who have experienced these things, please let me hear from you!!!

  Thanks again,

  by grace
• 
  15

  Had a major illness disappear after leaving WT?

  by by grace in

  1. jw
  2. friends

  i'm looking for people who have had the experience of becoming very sick with chronic pain, an auto-immune disease, or some major health problem (collitus, diabetes, etc.

  ) while being involved with jehovah's witnesses, who then had a complete reversal after leaving the jehovah's witnesses.. i am planning to write a book about my experience, and i'd like to get an idea of how many people out there have had a similar one.

  i was diagnosed with advanced grave's disease (hyperthyroid), which is an auto-immune disease, and it amazingly "went away" shortly after i left the organization.

  1. 
  2. 
  3. 
• 

  by grace

  Hi everyone,

  I'm looking for people who have had the experience of becoming very sick with chronic pain, an auto-immune disease, or some major health problem (Collitus, Diabetes, etc.) while being involved with Jehovah's Witnesses, who then had a complete reversal after leaving the Jehovah's Witnesses.

  I am planning to write a book about my experience, and I'd like to get an idea of how many people out there have had a similar one. I was diagnosed with advanced Grave's disease (hyperthyroid), which is an auto-immune disease, and it amazingly "went away" shortly after I left the organization. I honestly didn't expect that to happen. I hoped, but didn't really think it could happen.....but it did!!! I am researching the effects of emotions on physical health. It's my opinion that the stress of being a Jehovah's Witness was so mentally/emotionally draining that it caused my body to have all kinds of pains and to even attack itself.

  I ask that you reply to this topic only if you are willing to give me consent to use your information in my book. I will not publish anyones name or anything like that. I only want to be able to give some examples of what people have experienced. The reason I want to write this book, is to hopefully help those who are still in the organization and even many of those who have left, as well as the whole world, to understand the power of the emotional trauma that one experiences by being a Jehovah's Witness, and also the relief one has when they are freed from the control/manipulation. It is truly amazing.

  Thank you so much,

  by grace

  I
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  33

  New here.

  by On the Fence in

  1. jw
  2. experiences

  this is my first time posting, although i've read for a while.

  i've been a (bad example of) a witness now for about 15 years.

  in all those 15 years, i did not at any time have a good friend within the congo.

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  by grace

  As far as your spiritual path from here? The field's wide open. The churches aren't all wrong, controlled by Satan, etc, like the Watchtower fed us all that time. In truth, they contain normal people, living normal lives, and worshipping the god of the Bible. Allow yourself to experience them for yourself.

  Almost Athiest,

  I like your comment, it is so true. I just learned this one myself!!! I've been out for 7 months and was shocked to find out how GOOD people are!! I keep meeting person after person that is kind and good. What a shock!!

  ~by grace
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  11

  Cyberguy’s one year anniversary! Free at last! Free at last!

  by cyberguy in

  1. jw
  2. experiences

  hey everyone!

  its been one year since i attended meetings of jws!

  i've done the slow-fade thing since then, had several road-bumps, but i have no regrets!

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  by grace

  Congratulations Cyberguy,

  I'm so happy to hear about others who are free....for longer than I have been....that are so very happy about their decision.

  Happy anniversary to you Cyber!! from by grace
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  14

  Anniversary of sorts today, 6 years since I left

  by dedpoet in

  1. jw
  2. friends

  yes, it is 6 years today since i entered a kingdom hall for the very last time, and with each passing year this particular "anniversary" gets happier.

  even better this time, i have so many people to share it with who have had the same kind of jw experiences as me, in the past the friends i have made since leaving the lie kind of acknowledged it, but didn't really understand, so i just want you all to share in my joy today.

  dedpoet

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  by grace

  Congratulations dedpoet,

  That is soooooooooo great. I have only been out for 7 months, but I can imagine how happy you must be. I feel like I have a lot to be thankful for this year, that's for sure!!! So, yes, here's to the next 6 years. ****cheers****